


Not Qualified

by calbits



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Curiosities Collection, Gen, credence has to put up with it, newt is sneaky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 14:49:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8805103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calbits/pseuds/calbits
Summary: To be fair, Credence thinks, they really weren't qualified for this.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Aren't you a bit... not... qualified?

It had been a simple oversight, really. An easy mistake amidst the excitement of seeing one Mr. Scamander again, whole and hale in the blustery, windy autumn that had overtaken New York. It’s been ten months since the eclectic Magizoologist had been gently but firmly escorted off of American soil, and Queenie’s squeal of surprise at finding him outside their door one October evening had Tina running from her room bearing little but a dressing robe and wand. 

After embarrassments were stowed and greetings given- “No, I have a place thank you, just wanted to drop by- Queenie yes you know I’ve eaten it’s fine, no, thank you, really-“ and “Yes, Ms. Goldstein- Tina, yes, I brought the manuscript for you- not quite finished yet.” The man stands in their parlor and fidgets with his suitcase, trying to figure out just how to bring up his second bit of news. Queenie, of course, beats him to it with a second exclamation and a glowing smile of delight.

“Oh! Well isn’t that just wonderful! Don’t keep us waiting, let’s see the sweet dear! I know he won’t turn down my dinner.” Which is how one Ms. Porpetina Goldstein is left rather thunderstruck on her own sofa as Newt unlatches his case, and out steps a figure they were absolutely sure had been so cruelly dispatched the winter before. 

Standing tall, with only a bit of a self-conscious head bob and a shy sort of smile, Credence Barebone is hardly recognizable in work-worn but sturdy clothes, boots much like the ones Newt himself favors, and hair grown into a comfortable if not-quite-fashionable length, soft curls tied loosely at the nape of his neck. Tina is still trying to work out logistics in her mind –not to mention the mountain of investigative paperwork that would be landed on her freshly returned Auror desk if news of this got out- when Credence turns that smile on her, with a soft “Ma’am,” that has all thoughts of reporting this melting from her mind. 

Queenie gives her a grin. Tina huffs. Newt cuffs at his nose and pretends to not be immensely proud of himself. 

Dinner happens despite Newt’s protests, and amidst the conversation learns that this isn’t the first bit of rather pertinent information Tina’s kept from MACUSA, on behalf of personal reasons.

“Jacob has- Jacob has what?” 

It seemed that Queenie simply hadn’t been able to stay away- not that Newt had expected her to, but he had expected her to last a bit longer than six months. Jacob Kowalski has had his memories of magic returned for four, and has apparently kept quite mum about it all. Newt’s rather impressed with them both, but decides not to say in front of Tina. Queenie reaches across the table to squeeze his hand briefly, Tina’s brows scrunch in suspicion, and Credence keeps his eyes on his plate and mind his own business, much as he’s learned to do since being scooped up and added to Mr. Scamander’s misfit menagerie. 

The ensuing excitement of learning that his friend has regained his memories has Newt ready to bound from the Goldstein apartment, and only fast acting on Tina’s part convinces him to wait until morning. “What if someone sees you? What if he’s overheard and recognized? And you- you aren’t even supposed to be here!” 

So Newt stays. Impatiently. Twirls his wand in his fingers and taps his foot against the leg of the table, letting Queenie fill up the time with idle chatter aimed in Credence’s direction. “Jacob, he’s the No-Maj we all met last year! Wonderful man. Just great. Wait ‘til you meet him! Wait ‘til you try his turnovers! Oh, Newt’s just being fussy is all, it’s fine- you’re used to it aren’t you- poor thing, being drug about all over creation behind him-“ This at least gets a smile from Tina, however worried it is. Newt very much wishes to back out of the room and disappear. 

Saying goodbye to the women involves some awkward thank you’s from Credence, and several promises from Newt not to go barging in on Jacob at this time of night. In the morning though, first thing, Credence watches with bemusement as Newt bobs down the sidewalk of New York, ducking and weaving through the crowds to a rhythm only he seems able to hear, suitcase thudding along at his side. He stays back a little ways as Newt pauses on the sidewalk, peering into a bakery storefront with one of those rare, blinding smiles of his. This of course only lasts a moment before he’s all but exploded through the front door, bell tinkling in alarm at the sudden rudeness of a person. 

The gangly brunette misses the initial reaction, but given the disarrayed state of the service counter, one toppled pastry display, three scandalized customers, and two grown men caught in an embrace and laughing for all their worth, he feels it was safe to think it for the better. Jacob closes up shop soon after their arrival – “Hey, it’s no big deal, I’m making more than a living now, and it’s not every day I get a dead guy and a wizard in my shop!” which leads them to scones over coffee, while Jacob and Newt exchange stories and Credence does his best to not feel terribly out of place, counting down the minutes until he’s allowed to escape this awful city and hide away, back inside Newt’s case. 

Conversation of their –so far, rather limited- travels and Jacob’s business lead to the reminiscing of some of their escapades in New York, and the discussion of just what creatures are about now.

“You’re sure? Here?”

“Course I’m sure! Queenie said it herself, learned it from Teenie. Think there’s any better source than that?”

The curiosity in question is, predictably, a creature that’s currently residing in New York. Or rather, creatures. Tina has apparently been having a hell of a time tracking down a Crup breeder in the area, and Newt perks up at this bit of information like, well, like a Crup with a bone. 

“Now, don’t you go getting’ any ideas. Remember the last time-“

“Yes, I know Jacob, but this is much more important. They shouldn’t be handled by just anyone and if the MACUSA get there first…”

Credence gets the distinct impression this isn’t the first time Jacob has gone along with one of Newt’s –fairly frequent- schemes when he gives a long-suffering sigh, waving a hand.

“Yeah, yeah, get outta here. I’ve got you covered if the girls come lookin’, but that’ll only last so long, you know?”

“Of course! Credence. Or, Jacob, if you wouldn’t mind…”

Credence tries not to let it bother him that he isn’t allowed on this little side-adventure either. It’s for his own good he knows- too much excitement for him meant disaster for everyone. But. Still.

“Hey, yeah, why not. Hey kid, you any good with pretzel makin’?”

It isn’t until after Newt is out the door and lost in the crowds of the city that Credence suddenly realizes that Newt hadn’t really explained why he needed to come back to New York so suddenly in the first place, and it takes all he has not to bang his head against the floured breadboard he’s working on alongside Mr. Kowalski. Of course Newt had known about this- how wouldn’t he? And it really was a brilliant bit of acting on his part but the sheer nerve alone was more than Credence can think about without developing one of his quickly dubbed ‘Newt Headaches.’

He’s torn from his thoughts by the sound of a hollow thump near the register, followed by a hasty scritch-scratching across the floor. Sharing a glance with Mr. Kowalski, the both of them peer around the corner only to find a young Occamy, sitting happy as you please in the faded light of the closed and curtain drawn bakery floor. Only feet away is Newt’s case, latches popped and lid cracked.

“Oh! Yeah, I remember these guys. First magic-y thing I ever saw, and if it wasn’t for a few eggs I wouldn’t have this place.” Jacob dusts off his hands and makes to move towards the little creature, but Credence’s firm grasp on his arm holds him back. “Kid, it’s alright. I know how to handle these ones.”

Credence shakes his head in abrupt disapproval. “These ones- they aren’t as- as docile as the uh, the ones from before? Got scared when they were little so they’re kind of more… different.” He doesn’t bother to inform the man that the scare had been an accident from himself, resulting in a nasty bite and him reverting to a form that they hadn’t liked. At all. 

“Hey, it’s good, I got this.” Jacob moves forward again, and Credence tries one last time. “Aren’t you a bit… not… qualified?” The portly man pauses a foot from the now bristling creature, turning to Credence with a shrug and a confident air. “Hey, I did it with Newt, how hard can it be-ow!”

To be entirely fair, Newt should have been proud that the bakery itself was still standing by the time he returned, Credence thinks. The fact that there’s a fully-sized Occamy taking up residence in the cold storage, three Golden Snidgets on the loose in the pantry, a Kneazle playing soccer with a bit of bread crust, and both himself and Jacob piled on top of his suitcase like their lives depended on it, well. They really weren’t qualified for this.


End file.
